What to do about the new energy of exploitation. It seems pervasive because it is pervasive. Those who say Trump does not represent who we are as a collective – they are wrong. There is enough of this energy among the greater population to bring a leader like that into being. Many of those who claim to be offended by his actions and character, can’t see how closely they mirror his energy. They can’t see how powerfully they open the path that makes his way to the highest seat in the land. Until we see who we are and find our moral center – we will have the lies, wars and the battles and the hatred we see all around us. If we vilify others to shield ourselves – we are the same energetic that otherizes the oppressed and the victimizations of war. It is the same act that fosters these things. If we look we’ll see. If we don’t we won’t. The first correction to be made is within. Nothing outward will otherwise ever change. If we lie to ourselves, and refuse to see the truth of ourselves – then that is what we will get in every area of development. If its in you – it is out there. You want to remove it from out there – remove it from within. It is that simple.

That is why I stand by my devotion to the people I love whether they love me or not. I stand behind what I gave of myself, even in the instances where I may have been used or misled or where mutuality was a false pretense for one sided gain. I won’t let in be my conversion. I stand by choices to err on the side of belief, when time and due course pained me to have to learn otherwise. 

I did not give of myself for anyone’s favor. I won’t be marred by the inevitable contempt that comes when the taker casts aspersion to deflect their exploitation and mitigate their accountability for harm. A robber prefers not to know their mark, but when they do, they have no choice but to openly despise them. The price of a generous heart is that it shines as a predator’s lure. Loss and maturing discernment is its only survivable course in a world that is increasingly structured for deception and individual gain. Look around you, and into her many habitats –  you’ll notice the numbers don’t bode well. The generous heart is increasingly at risk for extinction. The only creature whose extinction weighs as heavily on survival of the human race are the bees, and they at least have the backing of a publicity campaign. 

The generous heart is often branded naive or a fool. The “fill your cup first, and only give when it is overflowing” is a reasonable piece of wisdom for the billionaire calibrating his or her substantial course. But do not forget, that like the many accoutrement, perhaps very well deserved, that rest at the beckon of the magnate – it is a luxury for others to never over-extend. A luxury of which by the lesser endowed, there may not be such an option. What is further true of the gifted successful, if you listen critically as the purveyor of this philosophy tells their story – more often than not, there is a person in their developmental background that “if not for whom“ they never would have become what they are in their prime of accomplishment. Their successes would not have been possible without the “without whom.” And equally as often, it is someone who gave to them ahead of self, and went without to do it. We learn that it was a generous heart who engendered the fortitude they relied upon, or instilled the inherent value they came to know they had. We come to understand that it was these things more than anything else that paved their road to remarkable accomplishment. They knew their worth and believed in themselves because of a generous heart who showed them. And yet still, they recommend the new self first philosophy. 

It is enticing when “fill your cup first” is presented as a skill to be developed by a life coach selling permission to just do you. Or those that espouse the idea to only associate with the upwardly mobile. It has remained a successful draw for the McMansion crowd, and even the aspiring modern day Shaman selling the idea that we can manifest anything by ourselves – forgetting that the origin of The Shaman was preservation and benefit to the clan, tribe or a collective society in whatever form. The Shaman’s survival was also dependent on the collective. No one teaches separation to a greater degree than those teaching that we are not our brother’s keeper. There was a time when we knew that the most vital form of self care, was to be our brother’s or sister’s keeper – and to keep them well as we would ourselves. 

There is a lot of push to deter the generous heart. There are more pitfalls than before for the person who strives to be a generous heart. You take some big knocks, and it’s easy to believe that perhaps you are too soft, perhaps it is wrong to put others before yourself regardless of circumstance. And certainly it is true that you have to take care of yourself and not deplete yourself in every department of life – and to know what does belong in your wheelhouse and what you should leave to others as theirs. When it comes to those you love in critical times of need, and even those you don’t even know in certain situations – there is a need for people who will dig deep and over-extend and go without to get the group through certain situations. Too many won’t take up that burden. And some will exploit those who honestly will, for their ease and convenience. Discernment is important, but don’t despair if you are ever fooled. It is the side to err on. You are not a fool.

If you’ve been exploited or been subject to a person or group taking advantage of you – don’t throw in the towel. Don’t wave the white flag in surrender. Pick yourself up when you can. Tend your wounds and know your contributions weren’t wasted or lost simply because they were acquired from you by false pretense, false friendship or feigned inclusion that turned out to be a ruse or energy theft. Don’t despair. Let it go, and move forward undeterred. There is never a loss for honest generosity. It finds its own, in its time and in its higher purpose. Trust and let go. Stand up for yourself and call out misuse if you see it. But don’t be discouraged when your calls are dismissed and no moral compass points their way. They know. And time will bring awareness. More so than anything you can draw out. If you’ve been exploited, the exploiter has only one option aside from correction, and that is rejection and even vilification. The more extreme the disdain shown to you – the more certainty they know what they have done. Nothing you can do – don’t try – let go.

It’s a huge blow to have been used, or to be dismissed unappreciated. I’ve been through it just like you have. It’s excruciating when it’s by someone you love. But those afflictions of the soul have nothing to do with me or my love. This is the condition of their heart, not mine. And it is not the condition of yours either. Don’t let it bring about a bitterness in you. 

My love is never false or a pretense to gain something. My love is real, authentic and incorruptible. Let yours be too. I’d rather that be true of me than anything else in this world. That’s the one thing I will always get to keep. Knowing my love and my effort in the lives of others was the real thing. If I had a choice of what I got to know for sure – that’s exactly what I’d want to be true of me. And that’s exactly what is true of me. I am the person I wanted to be. No matter what anyone else values – that’s what they got with me. What I got in return has nothing to do with me. What you were shown in return has nothing to do with you. It defines them, and that is what they will live with as who they are.  I won’t carry that. Don’t you either.